How to Cope With Stress for a Happier Life

It’s important to learn how to cope with the stress in your life. Researchers have linked it to dozens of medical conditions. Learning to handle stress in a positive  way can change your life for the better. Instead of being overwhelmed and unhappy – you can be centered and content.

When it comes to stress, you’re far from powerless—there are a number of positive habits and behaviors you can use to effectively manage your mental state and bring your stress under control.
The first thing to remember is that your mental state is your responsibility.

The simple truth is you can’t control how your boss acts. You can’t control what your partner says. You can’t control the driver who cuts you off in traffic. But you can control yourself.

Others will do what they do, but how you respond to them—whether you take it in stride or freak out—is your decision alone.

Take a moment to consider how you have been responding to the stressors in your life. Almost everyone has some habit they turn to when life gets rough—what’s yours?

Do you reach for a cigarette or alcoholic beverage? Do you take your stress out on others? Do you overeat? Though they might provide short term relief, these behaviors are ultimately self-destructive. They hold you back from what you really want—a peaceful, balanced and abundantly healthy mind and body.

Learning to Relax

So what can you do? Next time you notice yourself feeling like the sky is about to fall, quickly and effectively bring your thoughts into positive alignment with one of the following simple techniques:

* Deep breathing. When you become stressed, take a moment and pay close attention to your breathing. Shallow breathing leads to greater stress and more negative physical responses. So breathe deeply instead. Let your stomach expand and contract as you breathe in and out.

This is called diaphragmatic breathing. Count the seconds as you breathe in—one, two, three, four. Hold for another four seconds. Then exhale slowly, for eight whole seconds. Keep doing this until you relax.

* Mental imagery. If you observe your thoughts during stressful situations, you may be surprised by how negative they are. These thoughts create a kind of feedback loop that only reinforces your negative emotions and causes you to feel even more stressed. One way to break this pattern of negative thinking is with positive mental imagery.

Visualize the calmest, happiest and most comfortable setting you can imagine, and mentally place yourself right into the middle of it. It might be a warm sunny beach with a calm breeze, or a peaceful afternoon in your coziest chair. Whatever it is, picture it as vividly as you can.

Make it real. Involve all your senses—what do you see, smell, taste, hear, feel? Smile inside, and become involved in the scene as it unfolds.

* Muscle relaxation. It might sound counterintuitive, but to relax, sometimes you have to tense up! But only for a moment—tense and relax different parts of your body beginning and the top of your head and continuing down. Include your eyes, neck, jaw, shoulders, legs, feet and any other part of your body that feels tight. Tense up, then let go, and feel the tension flow out of you as you relax.

* Biofeedback. With biofeedback, you learn to control your mood through careful attention to your mental and physical state. The training is simple and inexpensive and can even be done at home using easy-to-use feedback equipment. If you want to, you can also schedule an appointment with a trained biofeedback practitioner who will walk you through techniques used to reduce and eliminate the negative effects of stress on the body.

The great thing about these techniques is that with practice they become almost effortless and so easy that you can use them in anywhere. When things get crazy and your life is most stressful, you might not be able to find a comfortable, quiet place to unwind, but you can still use these relaxation techniques to manage your emotions and reclaim control of your mental state.

Making this kind of real positive change is never easy, but it can save your life. Your health depends directly on how you manage your stress. So take a deep breath, and start helping yourself let it go.